Act II

Continued Battle of the Bulge

2009-12-22T12:01:00.000-08:00

Weight: 227
Waist: 43"
BMI: 35.6

Another Diet Failure

2009-08-16T12:25:00.000-07:00

Well, the diet lasted all of two days. Here I am just back from having a crab cake sandwich and fries at a local restaurant. Last night was Chinese food. The first breakdown was a chocolate craving satisfied by brownies. Oh well, at least I'm still walking, but I don't think it's doing a thing except maybe keeping me from gaining even more weight! Ugh.

Saturday Night

2009-08-08T18:34:00.000-07:00

Here it is, Saturday night. Recently finished a great dinner of filet mignon on the grill and salad with tomatoes and mozerella and a good bottle of red wine. This was followed by a desert purchased from a french bakery today at lunch. Yummy. Eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow we shall diet! Yes, that's right. Yet another attempt at dieting. How many times is this? Too many to count. We are going to Italy in a little more than 4 weeks and I weigh more than I ever have. Whether this is due to meds, perimenopause or just plain overeating and lack of exercise, I do not know. I do know that I am afraid I will have to request a seat belt extender on the airplane! Horror of horrors! I have been walking on my treadmill for 1 mile a day about 5 days per week for several weeks and haven't lost one ounce! Whether I will be able to stick to an eating plan for a month, I do not know. More to be revealed in the days and weeks ahead.

I'm Back?

2009-07-26T13:04:00.000-07:00

Hey, trying to see if I want to reactivate this account. It's been 1.5 years (!) since I posted anything. Amazing that these things just hang around in cyberspace. My fear, however, is that I don't have anything to say. However, I need a hobby and maybe this can be it.

Christmas in NYC

2007-12-27T14:52:00.000-08:00

DH's son lives in NYC and this year he invited us to spend Christmas with him and his partner and his partner's parents in NY. We went on the 20th and came back on Christmas Day, with Christmas Eve being the family dinner and gift exchange. We had a wonderful time (as long as I don't think of the cost. Prices are breathtaking and we ate out a lot and took a lot of cabs. Fortunately, part of the trip was DH's son's Christmas gift to us, and his grandmother, who was with us.) We stayed at a hotel that was next to the World Trade Center site. Here are some views from our window.

One day we visited DS (Dear Son's) office, which is on the 66th floor in the Chrysler Building. The vistas were amazing.

Here is a photo of a gallery space at the Metropolitan Museum of Art that I particularly liked.
Part of a Christmas window at Bergdorf Goodman's.
Let's see if I can remember all the things we did:

Thursday evening: arrived; ate dinner at Duane Park Cafe, a neighborhood restaurant
Friday: visited the Met; lunch at Cafe Boulud; visit with cousin; jazz and dinner at the Jazz Standard/Blue Smoke
Saturday: Spent the day in Brooklyn visiting old friends of the family; lunch at a local pizza place; visit with another cousin; dinner at the Hearth; theater--The Piano Teacher
Sunday: The Tenement Museum followed by lunch in China Town; dinner that night at Georgione's
Monday: lunch at the Bar Room at the Museum of Modern Art followed by visiting some of the exhibits and last minute Christmas shopping in the gift store; viewing of Christmas windows at Bergdorf's; Chirstmas Eve Dinner and gifts at DS's apartment.
Tuesday: Home again, home again.

Happy Thanksgiving

2007-11-18T17:20:00.000-08:00

I haven't felt like blogging much recently. We are leaving for Maryland on Tuesday to spend Thanksgiving with my family. Harry and Meg will come with us. I am looking forward to it and hope we will have a good time without too much family drama. Hope everyone else who celebrates the day has a Happy Thanksgiving. Be safe!

Happy Birthday Granny!

2007-11-11T13:38:00.001-08:00

Today is my paternal grandmother's 92nd birthday. She is doing well, living in a retirement community in Maryland. My parents, along with one of my nephews, his girlfriend, and Granny's daughter, are taking her out to dinner tonight. Granny has always been stylish and made almost all of my clothes until I was about 11. I was her first grandchild; she was only 44 when I was born. She and I used to watch the Miss America Pageant together to see all the gowns. When I was out with her people sometimes thought she was my mother. She didn't have the opportunity for much formal education beyond high school, but she is an avid reader and traveler. She has visited many places around the world. She and her siblings overcame a lot of hardship in their lives. I wish I was with her today, but will see her at Thanksgiving.

At the Zoo

2007-11-04T14:09:00.001-08:00

While in Laguna Beach, we went to see the San Diego Zoo--about a 90 minute drive south. I had an image of the SDZ as one of the best and had wanted to see it for a long time. Either my standards for zoos have increased or I haven't been to a zoo in a while and held an outdated image, but I was disappointed. We were there in the mid-afternoon and did not take very many photos, but the animals all looked bored and tired to me--a function of being captive in the zoo or naptime after lunch?

Countertops

2007-10-31T18:09:00.000-07:00

Happy Halloween. Anyone have any trick-or-treaters? We had 43. Yep--counted 'em.

Here are some photos of the new countertops. They are quartz. Hope we didn't make a mistake by not getting granite. Seems every home improvement show we watch goes gaga over granite.

The next project is the floor. Not that fond of the green vinyl. Am thinking of trying to install a tile floor myself. Color--some shade of beige or brown, of course!

Well, that's it for today. Sure am enjoying these fall temperatures. Off to Chicago next week.

Waiting

2007-10-26T10:16:00.000-07:00

I am waiting for the countertop installers to come back to finish the job they started yesterday. The were supposed to finish yesterday, but one of the pieces was not the correct size, so they said they would be back either yesterday afternoon or today with the correct piece. Yesterday afternoon, they called to say it would be today at 11:00. Then, today around 11:00 one of the guys called to say he was supposed to be here at 12:30 (surprise to me) but that he would be a little late--12:45 (hardly worth calling about). However, here it is at 1:20 and still no installers and no additional phone call. In the meantime, it is raining (yay!) and we are expecting company to arrive for the weekend around 3:00. At this point, the countertop probably will not be complete by then. I took the day off of work. I need to vacuum, but if I start vacumming and the countertop guy arrives, I won't be able to hear him (this is the kind of thing I worry about.). DH is at work, but leaving early to go grocery shopping. I feel stuck and increasingly irritable about the whole thing. So, just thought I would take this opportunity to post to my blog ;-) Oh, also, I'm not convinced that I just love the new countertops--all $5,500 worth of them!!

More on Laguna Beach

2007-10-18T19:12:00.000-07:00

We're back. Really enjoyed LB while we were there. The flight(s) back weren't very pleasant. That's the problem with visiting somewhere on the opposite coast. Oh well, I'm looking at photos and remembering the good times. The last day was the best. It started out overcast, but ended up 70 and sunny. I took a walk on the beach, had a swim, and then DH and I went to the San Diego Zoo and out to dinner. The Zoo was not as nice as I expected, but dinner was fabulous (and only cost a little more than breakfast at the resort!). We ate at a place called 75 French. The decor was rich, sedate, and private and the food was outstanding! I started with lobster prepared two ways--a bisque and a small sandwich called a slider. This was followed by spinach and fingerling potatoes topped with a perfectly cooked halibut fillet. DH started with a salad of butter lettuce and blue cheese and then had duck prepared three ways. His dessert was best--an apple pastry with cinnamon ice cream. Below are a few photos of LB--sorry no photos of the food!

The view from our balcony!
A series of switchback paths led down to the beach. I was intrigued by this plant with the purplish/maroon leaves (flowers?).

A view as we walked down the path.

The "old man in the cliff."

The Montage

2007-10-13T17:19:00.000-07:00

Hello from The Montage at Laguna Beach! This place is amazing, although I do feel somewhat like a poser being here. I wonder how many other folks are here on expense account who otherwise would never be able to afford a place like this? Photos will have to wait till I get home.

The Montage sits on cliff overlooking the Pacific. Views from our room are spectacular. The staff here are all trained to stop and stand aside whenever you pass. Very odd! Prices for food are astronomical. This morning our breakfast for two was $85.00. Beautifully landscaped. We saw some hummingbirds feeding on flowers; thought of Mary.

That's it for now. More later.

Off to Laguna Beach

2007-10-11T13:30:00.000-07:00

Just a quick post to say we are leaving for Laguna Beach, CA tomorrow morning. After several weeks of effort, I have managed to lose all of 1.5 lbs.! However, my big clothes do fit, so I am not going to worry about it while we are gone--just have a good time! Finally, we have some beautiful fall weather here in NC. It's supposed to be in the 70s out in Laguna Beach, too. "Talk" to you all in a week or so.

Sunday Post

2007-10-07T06:29:00.000-07:00

Well, ladies, I think we've gotten all the mileage we can out of the hair color post. Inspired by Mary's recent post, yesterday I went around my yard and took photos of everything in bloom. Here are the results.

My mother-in-law says these flowers are called something like "Japanese Anemonies?" Can anyone confirm or refute? We have white ones in the front and pink in the back. They don't start blooming until September. (Don't adjust your glasses--the pink ones are out of focus!)
I've never known what these little grape flowers are called, either. (And, yes, that is a maple tree taking root in a flower bed, and water droplets--from the sky, not from a hose!)
Flower on one of our pond plants:
Lone red bloomer:
A scraggly collection around the mailbox:

A New Phase

2007-10-03T15:20:00.000-07:00

Well, I've graduated to a whole new phase of life. . .trifocals! Just picked them up today. They are those "seamless" type. Distance and close-up are great. I'm having trouble with the mid-range (unfortunately, including the computer screen), but my understanding is that my brain will adjust. So, now it is glasses on all the time as opposed to peering over or taking on and off. Something to get used to. I've also stopped coloring my hair to cover the gray. In order to make the transition more gradual, I am now getting it highlighted to blend the brown and the gray. Once all of the dyed hair grows out, I'll see what I'm left with (lots of gray on top and front; not so much in back). Anyway, I wonder if I'll look like a granny with my gray hair and glasses. Hey; I'm not even 50 yet!

Dieting, Again?

2007-09-30T11:46:00.001-07:00

No, not really, because I never got off the ground (so to speak) with that last diet (or the 3 since I wrote that post). In fact, as I so often do when even thinking about dieting, I've gained about 5-8 lbs. I am now feeling really uncomfortable in my biggest clothes. Not good!

I don't remember if I've posted about this before, but I am going with DH to Laguna Beach on Oct. 12 - 17. One of the organizations he manages is having a meeting out there and I am tagging along, which I try to do when he goes to particularly nice locations. Then, 3 weeks later, I am going to Chicago for the annual conference of the national organization I belong to. After that, we are going to NYC to visit DH's son for the week before Christmas. So, I have all of these occasions coming up and a shrinking wardrobe (Oh; I guess it's not shrinking literally. If it were only true!)

So, here's my latest plan. This morning we went to a favorite breakfast place and I had blueberry pancakes, which I had been craving. Now, I must put that behind me (oops; it's hard to write this post without making these types of references). I am setting some rules:

No wine or alcohol of any kind (empty calories that make me lose my inhibitions about eating more).
No sweets or processed foods except those I deem "diet" foods such as low-cal fudge bars, yogurt, sweetened low-fat ricotta, etc.
No eating after 8:00 p.m. except for one bowl of cereal or one diet treat (I find I really need some comfort food before bed.)
Remember at every meal that the stomach is only about as large as a fist and try not to stretch it out!
Lots of water.
And, finally, a promise to myself to use my rowing machine 10 minutes per day. I know that's not a lot but maybe it is enough to help me tone some muscles--particularly the upper arms (you ladies know what I mean).

My goals are to have my biggest clothes fit comfortably by the time we go to Laguna Beach and have them be loose by the time I go to Chicago. And, finally, to be in the next size down by the time we go to NYC. I really think these goals are reasonable. Wish me luck!!

More Kitchen Stuff

2007-09-28T17:15:00.000-07:00

This post is all about the kitchen and mostly just photos.

We decided to replace all of the gold knobs in our kitchen with silver ones.

We are thinking about replacing our laminate counter top with quartz. These are some samples that I ordered. I like the third from the left best (brown with white flecks). I think it will go well with our white cabinets and appliances.
Dinner the other night. The most deluxe tuna melts ever--made with crab salad, sliced tomato, grated cheddar, on a "Holland Rusk" (basically a piece of round toasted white bread). Here they are before the oven.

And, voile (sp?), dinner is served!

Wine, Chocolate, & Karaoke

2007-09-25T17:20:00.001-07:00

What do they have in common? Indulgence, pure indulgence. And, guilty pleasures. Has anyone tried the milk chocolate from Trader Joe's? It almost tastes like caramel--another of my favorite treats. Well boys and girls. . .can you guess? It's PMS time again.

Another Weekend Project

2007-09-23T11:13:00.000-07:00

We have been quite the busy homeowners lately. Our newest installation is a new light fixture in our foyer.

All of this foreign activity makes Meg a little nervous. (See the scratches in the sofa? From Meg. We ordered a new sofa yesterday, but it won't come in for months. The new sofa will have a blanket on it.)

Well, how do you like it? It's minimalist!
Okay; just kidding. Here's the real thing.
Here's a photo showing both the foyer and the dining room with both of our new lights. We like the way the forms echo each other. I think that's it for a while. Next, I would like to get new kitchen counters, but I don't think that will be DIY. I may, however, tile the kitchen floor!

New Light Fixture

2007-09-22T14:34:00.001-07:00

Yay! We found a light fixture that we thought would work well in our dining room in the Crate and Barrel catalog. It arrived today. Here are the results. You can compare to the results from my blog post from a week or two ago. (I copied the photo here for your viewing pleasure.) We REALLY like this one a LOT better! What do you think?

(BTW, if you click on the photo it enlarges and you can really see the details in the room. DH made all of the tea pots on the buffet.)

Favorite Summer Meal

2007-09-19T17:09:00.000-07:00

Tomatoes and mozzarella! Yum, yum. Slice up some tomatoes. Slice up some mozzarella. Chop up some fresh basil. Drizzle with olive oil and balsamic vinegar. Serve with crusty bread and red wine. Yummy!

Here are some photos of tonight's dinner:

A home grown tomato.

Four types of tomatoes. One homegrown and the others heirloom varieties from the grocery store.

The plated meal.

Enjoy!

The Birthday: Part 2

2007-09-18T14:48:00.000-07:00

(Continued from previous post.)

A message popped up on her screen: Birthday Reminder—Martha’s birthday is September 19^th. September 19^th? That didn’t sound right; she thought it might be the 16^th, which was today. She called her mother.

“Hi Mom.”

“Hi”

“How are you doing?”

“Fine.”

“I just called to ask you if today was Martha’s birthday.”

“Yes; it is.”

“Did you do anything to celebrate?”

“A few days ago, your father and I went with her to her house in Baltimore.” (This would be the row house she had rehabbed, but was having trouble selling. She almost said, “and you bought her house for her birthday!” But, before she could say it, her mother was saying, “Your Dad and I bought the house from her and plan to rent it out.”)

“You’re kidding! I was just going to say that, but as a joke!”

“Why, what’s wrong with that?”

“Well, you already own one house that you can’t sell (in addition to the one they lived in.) and now you have two and the housing market is terrible.”

“Well, Martha was going under. She was just drowning in debt. Parent’s can’t stand by and watch their children suffer.”

“I can't believe it. I think I’m missing out. Will you replace my kitchen?”

“Anyway, we took her out for lunch at Fell’s Point for her birthday.”

Yeah, right, she thought.

The Birthday: A short story

2007-09-17T06:11:00.000-07:00

Her husband woke her and she instantly knew why. She had been having a dream and banging her fist on the bed. In the dream, she was hitting her brother. As is so often the case with these things, when morning came, she could not remember anything else about the dream. Just that she was angry with her brother—more like frustrated. So frustrated that all she could manage to do was punch him. Not surprising.

Michael was 46 and lived in Mexico. The night before, she had several email exchanges with him. The subject was the contested custody of his two children. He and his Mexican wife were getting a divorce—a nasty one. Michael had not matured into a competent adult. She suspected he had bipolar disorder or something else that made it impossible for him to maintain jobs and relationships. And yet, he had moved to Mexico, fallen in love, and married a pregnant woman about 15 years his junior. They subsequently had a child of their own. The two girls were less than 2 years apart in age. Now the marriage was in the toilet and they were fighting over the kids. Michael currently had no consistent means of support, so how he was living, she didn’t understand. He obviously had enough money to pay for a roof over his head, an occasional outing with the girls, and lawyer fees, although she suspected the latter was working under agreement to be paid later, or else their parents were helping him. That would not be unusual, although she never knew how much her parents helped him and her sister. Michael was always the whipping boy of the family and her mother was more inclined to help him than her father, but even her father was unlikely to stand by while one of his children were in such dire straights.

She had talked with her mother earlier that day and suspected that the dream was more a result of that conversation, which had more to do with her sister. (To be continued.)

Oh What A Beautiful Morning

2007-09-16T15:01:00.000-07:00

Oh, what a beautiful day. I've got a beautiful feeling; everything's going my way! (Oklahoma)

It was sunny and 55 degrees when we got up this morning!! Loved it! Took the dogs for a nice walk. They were frisky. The Morning Glories that took months to produce one bloom are full of blooms these days.

I am so happy that our 2007 conference is history! There were a few glitches, but, all in all, I think it was a success. We seemed to get more on-site registrations than usual, so I am looking forward to seeing the final numbers (financial, that is!). Our opening and closing keynote speakers were big hits.

I tackled the grouting on the kitchen tile project today. I ran out of grout before I was finished. Grouting was more difficult than putting the tiles up (and surprisingly physical). I think I liked them better before the grout, but it is better than a plain painted wall that was getting stained with grease from cooking! Compared to putting small tiles on a small wall space between the counter and the cabinets, I think doing a large horizontal space like a kitchen or bathroom floor would be relatively easy. I will probably take on those projects at some point now that I've gotten my feet wet.

(In the photo above, the grouted tile is on the left and the not yet grouted tile is on the right. What do you think?)

Well, hope all out there in cyberland have been well. I have not caught up with reading other blogs yet, but I am off work tomorrow, so I will probably "drop in" then! Take care.

September 11th

2007-09-11T19:27:00.000-07:00

I was so busy getting ready for our annual conference--the signature event of my organization--that I almost forgot it was September 11th. I had thought about it first thing in the morning. I meant to wear a pin with red, white, and blue ribbons on it that a colleague made for all of us in the office 6 years ago. Ironically, that was the first year I worked where I am now and we were preparing for conference when the Twin Towers were hit. Then, I went off to graduate school for 4 years and now I am back at the same place I left--albeit in a different position. However, my colleague has been there the entire time. Of course, I forgot to wear the pin. Then, I thought about September 11th again in the afternoon. She (my colleague) told me that she had never watched any of the video footage of that day--the thought of it was just too hard. I told her that to me, the images of the planes flying into the Twin Towers was surreal. What really got me was seeing the videos of New Yorkers streaming down the street in confusion and terror with dust and debris all around them. We are spending Christmas in NYC with my stepson who lives a few blocks from where the World Trade Center used to be. I am angry and dismayed that 6 years later, Osama Bin Laden is still free, but we have made a mess of Iraq!

My mom just sent me this quote. I must try to remember this more often: "Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."

Take care.

More on Tiling

2007-09-09T17:41:00.000-07:00

Next lesson: There's a fine line between not enough tile adhesive and too much. Also, getting tiles to fit around light switches is challenging. The tiles I used were 2"x2", 1"x1" and 1/2"x1". We do not have a tile cutter and I did not rent one. We had decided on a pattern for laying the tiles. However, fitting tiles around the light switches caused some slight changes in design. Oh well. . .it is rustic. Here are a few photos. I still have to grout the tiles, but I probably won't do that till next weekend. The organization I work for puts on a large statewide conference annually and it is this coming week, so I will be away for a few days.

DIY

2007-09-09T11:08:00.000-07:00

Hi there!

I finally have something to post about after a long absence. I am putting up a tile backsplash behind our stove. DH and I are not DIYers (for others who are not DIYers, it means "do it yourself), but I like watching those shows on HGTV and tiling always looks to me like something I might like to do. I react to the idea of it in a similar way that I reacted to the idea of working with clay. So, we decided to give it a try on this small project. I am taking photos to document the process and will post when I am finished. Three things I have learned so far: 1) make sure all the tile you buy is the same kind (we realized 2 packs out of 6 were slightly different once we got them home), 2) be careful when pouring the liquid sealant into a container--that is the time when it might splash on your face (just a little drop), and 3) when it is incredibly hot outside, take the plastic wrap off of the tiles while you are in the air conditioned house rather than taking them all out onto the deck first! Here are some pics of the start of the project:

Oh, yes, but before I move on to more tiling, we did do one other project this weekend. DH replaced the chandelier in our dining room. We didn't like the one that came with the house. I saw an ad in the paper last weekend, asked DH, "how about this one?" We went to see it, bought it and, after quite a bit of effort, DH got it hung and working. We stepped back to see the effect. Ugh. . .we don't like it! Now that it's in place, we can see that it is too big, too dark, and too rustic for our furniture. Why couldn't we see that before we put it up!? Here are some pics:

Happy Birthday Dear Hubby!

2007-08-27T16:11:00.000-07:00

DH turns 63 today. We had a birthday brunch on Saturday because he is on a business trip in Gatlinburg, TN today. I didn't get him a present other than taking him, his mom, and a friend out to brunch on Saturday. Do you think that counts as a gift? His real reward for getting older is that he is planning on retiring from his current position at the end of October. The current plan seems to be that from then until the first of the year he may do some consulting for the company. After that, who knows?

Nutmeg

2007-08-26T17:49:00.000-07:00

I was debating what to write about--my troubled brother or DH's retirement plans. Both seemed weighty matters that might take some time and thought and I wasn't sure I was into it. Then it hit me. . .post some cute photos of Nutmeg (Meg)! This is a series of photos taken at my parents' house last Christmas. It shows Nutmeg coaxing their miniature dachshund (Brat) into playing with her. After all, Harry got the spotlight a couple of weeks ago. Have to give your "children" equal time.

Here's to Possumlady

2007-08-23T18:29:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Possumlady!! (tomorrow; had to post this before bed on Thursday so I wouldn't forget! Hey wait a minute; I just realized tomorrow is the 24th. B-day's not till Sat. Oh well, better early than late.)

Here's to a great friend and a wonderful human being. Loves animals, good food and wine, socially liberal, great sense of humor--what more could one want? We're getting awfully close to 50. Who knew we'd be so young at this age!

I give you a virtual gardenia! Do you smell the fragrance?

R.I.P. Rocket

2007-08-22T18:30:00.000-07:00

Sadly, the Eastern Box Turtle that showed up in our yard about a month ago has passed away. She had been lethargic for the past week or so--no longer interested in blueberries and spending all of her time in the pond. Today DH took her out of the pond and put her on the side of it and she barely moved. When he came home at lunch, she was dead. She is now buried in our yard.

Unfortunately, this past weekend when DH took the dogs for a walk in a neighboring woods, he found another turtle in a stream there. For some reason, he thought it would be fun to bring it home (I guess to see if the 2 turtles would interact!). So, he put the turtle on the ground near the pond and we haven't seen it since (actually, I never saw it). He now realizes that it was a dumb thing to do and wants to return it to the stream, but we have no idea where it is. I hope it is surviving this heat. Men!

Misc Photos

2007-08-19T17:50:00.001-07:00

I don't feel much like writing a post, but don't want to let another week go by without posting something. It seems I only get to this on the weekend. I've had a very low energy weekend (translation--I spent most of Saturday sleeping). So, for my post, I've searched for some old photos and new to share.

We bought this pot several years ago. I love the relief carving. I had always intended to put a plant in it but did not do it until last weekend. I selected a combination of 3 types of houseplants. I hope they do well.

This is a photo DH took years ago (5?) at the Shed aquarium in Chicago. I can't believe how well this photo turned out given that it was taken through glass. The one below of the Dolphin was also taken at the Shed. Doesn't it look so cool and peaceful?

I took this photo of an iris several years ago while visiting a Japanese garden in Portland.
This is a beautiful sunset that we saw while on vacation in Nags Head, NC. Also several years ago. It's amazing how the time flies by.

A little peek into our home. The painting above the mantel was done by DH's mother and the bowls were made by DH.

This recent photo is of the first Mexican Sunflower to bloom in our yard.

This photo of the Morning Glories was taken just a few days ago. They are the first flowers to appear on these vines, which were planted in May or June. The vine grew and grew till it was about to take over our deck before we got the first flowers. Now we get about one a day.

We were in Jamaica in 2005 and DH took this photo of a dramatic sunset. I worry that they have suffered much damage from Hurricane Dean.

Harry During a Rain Storm

2007-08-12T17:49:00.000-07:00

On Friday we had a very minor and fleeting rain storm. We've had some much more ferocious ones during the past couple of weeks and I guess that has Harry on heightened alert. Usually a cool character, he doesn't like thunder. He usually does not get up on the furniture. We allow him to, and actually encourage it, but he has arthritic hips and is usually self-limiting. The exception is when we have a storm. Then he wants to be very close to one of us and seems particularly comforted by being on the sofa or the bed. However, we had never seen him get up in this relatively small chair before. As you can see, DH was sitting in the next chair and Harry decided he wanted to be near him, even though I was on the roomier sofa and beckoned him to come sit by me. He quickly and gracefully got up in the chair. At 80 lbs., he barely fit!

He managed to turn himself around till he was facing backwards over the chair.

Then he laid down with his back to the rest of the world. I had never seen anything like this, so I had to take some photos!

At a certain point he decided to get off of the chair. I thought he was going to fall over backwards, but he managed to turn himself around without falling off. Then, a moment later, another distant rumble of thunder and he was back on the chair. This time facing forward. Meg gets a little apprehensive, but you can see she was content to stay on the floor. That is until Harry got off the final time. Then, she had to jump up on the chair and smell where he'd been!Just another Friday night at home. . .

Fact #8: I’ve taken a boat ride on the Seine. . .

2007-08-04T12:48:00.001-07:00

In the mid 90's, DH's job required some travel to Europe. I was fortunate to accompany him on these trips. Although it was work for him, we got to have some wonderful experiences that we never would otherwise.

Our first trip to Europe was to Berlin. I have to preface this by saying that I am afraid of flying, but I have not let that stop me from traveling. However, this would be the longest flight I had ever been on and the first time out of the country for both of us. I had the typical places on the top of my list that I wanted to visit in Europe, Paris being one. Berlin was not on the list. Berlin turned out to be a fabulous place with wide, tree-lined streets, parks, good restaurants. The Wall was down and one day I walked from our hotel to museums with stunning collections on the other side. (I'm sorry my memory is so bad. I'm terrible with details and names. Ironically, I was never one to keep a journal or even a travel diary so I must paint these trips with broad strokes. Also, I wish I knew where our photos from this time are. Of course, we've moved several times since then and we have many boxes that remain unpacked.)

This first trip to Europe was business for both of us in two different cities in Germany. We went to Berlin first followed by a trip to Heidelberg, where I had some business. Quite a contrast, but both wonderful. I'm not a big beer drinker, but I do have to say that I had some of the best beer and pork I've ever tasted in Germany. On this same trip, we did go to Paris, if only for a day and a half. Certainly not enough time, but I did get to take my boat trip on the Seine and walk around the Eiffel Tower under a full moon!

The organization for which DH worked at the time provided continuing education for a bunch of well-heeled docs so we got to travel first class. They would have dinners and receptions in wonderful places. One time we had dinner in an old English castle, complete with a moat. After dinner we walked around the grounds (I believe the moon was full on this night, as well!) with glasses of port and cigars for those who wanted them.

On one of our trips I did try to keep a travel diary, which, remarkably, is in a notebook that I always keep in my nightstand drawer, so I have it right here! I only wrote a few pages and mostly wrote about the food. On this particular trip, in June of '96, we went to Nice, Geneva, Florence and Venice. It was only an 8-day trip so we did not spend much time in any of the cities, which is probably why the meals were the highlights. The only time I describe anything other than food is at our first stop in Nice. I have to relate this story from my notes where I describe an encounter on the beach between "two middle-aged women": One in "peddle-pushers" and tee shirt with frizzy blond hair, backpack and dog, and one lying topless on a towel on the rocks with little goggles protecting her eyes. The dog goes to do a dump a few yards from the sunbather. The dog-owner takes a plastic bag from her backpack to clean up. Meanwhile, the sunbather sits up exposing, in a totally nonchalant way, her rather boney body with sagging breasts, to say something that looked like scolding to the dog walker. They exchange some words, finger-pointing, and then the dog & walker go on their way.

We had one of the most incredible dining experiences I've ever had while in Florence. There were about 16 of us at a restaurant called Enotecha Pinciori (spelling?). It was a 10 course meal--3 of them dessert courses--with 4 different wines. I actually went back to the hotel room and tried to describe all of the food. Here goes:
1. lightly smoked herring on a bed of bread crumbs, tomato, olive oil
2. cold tomato puree drizzled with olive oil with cold, lightly breaded fried turbo with julliened vegetable garnish
3. tortelinni stuffed with quail on a round slice of spinach pasta with dabs of cream sauce and olive oil garnished with a thin slice of friend tomato
4. sea bass, scallops, and red mullet with pureed eggplant with poppyseed wafers and fried parsley
5. narrow fettucine with baby peas, asparagus, carrots, and mushrooms in a butter sauce
6. lamb medallions with baked garlic cloves, peeled baby potatoes, and thyme
7. mixed salad greens with baked filo purse stuffed with melted cheese and sweet vinaigrette
8. cheese course
9. chocolate mousse "patty" with lemon ice and mango sorbet in cones
10. strawberry tart and biscotti and other assorted tiny cookies

Dinner lasted from 8:00 pm until midnight. I noted the wines as: Asti Spumanti, pino gregio, merlot blend, and a dessert white. Assortment of breads throughout. Espresso and latte at the end.

And, with that I think I'll end this post. I could go on; maybe more some other time.

Fact #7 I am an Atheist

2007-08-02T17:56:00.000-07:00

So, time to talk about one of the most personal of subjects--religion or lack thereof. After years of wondering, I have decided that I am, in fact, an atheist. I just don't believe. I cannot make myself feel a faith that does not exist within me. I believe that there are many things that are beyond my understanding, or that of any human being at this time, but I believe that reason is behind all things, whether or not we are capable of discerning that reason.

What has struck me upon this acceptance is that it is really quite socially unacceptable to be an admitted atheist. I keep silent among co-workers or acquaintances when the subject of God or religion comes up, which it often does, even in casual conversation. Over 80% of Americans declare themselves as Christians. Any arguments about religion are often about what faith one believes in--are you Christian, Jew, Muslim, Hindu, etc.? The atheists are truly a minority.

It would be comforting to have a God to believe in, but if you don't, you just don't. Wishing doesn't make it so. My mom and I were having a conversation about this recently (she is a Christian). She can't explain her faith. I said that's what faith is--you have faith, you don't justify or explain it. In the same way, I do not.

So, that's enough of that. I am thankful that I live in a place and time where I can express my lack of faith without overt or state sanctioned persecution, even if it is a view shared by few.

I Love Clay Part 2

2007-07-30T07:13:00.000-07:00

Well, I finally got around to narrating the photos below. Perhaps just a little more background is needed to round out the story. I had always loved pottery. When watching potters at the wheel at crafts fairs, I always wanted to reach out and touch the clay, but I never did. When I met DH, I found out that he had worked as a potter for about 7 years when he was in his 20's. I thought this was really cool and admired the things he had around the house from that time.

About 10 years into our marriage, DH and I hit a period where we wanted to explore a different way of life. We decided to move to a small town and open a pottery studio and crafts gallery. Without going into all the details, we did this. It lasted about 1 year while we struggled to find our design niche and watched our savings dwindle. Long story short, DH went back into the "traditional" workforce, which occasioned 2 moves until we found the place we are now.

We still have a potter's wheel, an extruder, a slab roller, some clay and some glaze chemicals. We gave away the electric kiln. We have not touched clay since we packed up our studio. However, one day when we get our garage cleaned out, maybe we will set up a small hobby studio. I miss playing with wet clay (always my favorite part, although I do like it at the leather hard stage, as well. Not that fond of decorating/glazing). So, I Love Clay is in hibernation right now, but could appear again one day.

I Love Clay

2007-07-25T19:15:00.000-07:00

Hi there,

It has been very busy around here with the family reunion over the weekend and then a visit by some cousins on Monday and an old friend on Tuesday, I've hardly had a chance to think about blogging. However, I didn't want to let too much time pass before moving on to my next fact: I love clay. As it turns out, though, I do not have much time or energy to post about this tonight. So, I leave you with some photos that I will narrate later.

It is now later. This head is my first project with clay. I took a clay sculpture class. We had a model who sat on a revolving stool encircled by about 10 students all modeling his head. The students would stay in one place and the man would move 1 quarter turn every 15 minutes. I really enjoyed this experience and thought my head looked quite a bit like the model.

After that, DH set up a studio in our garage with an electric potter's wheel that he had kept from 15-20 years earlier when he had worked as a potter and a newly purchased electric kiln. He started teaching me to throw pots on the wheel. I decided to take an entry level community college course. We learned to make pinch pots, slabs, and coils, and to begin to work on the wheel. Below is one of several assignments completed during that course: to make a set of goblets combining at least two of the techniques we had learned. These are made with pinch pots, extruded tubes, and coils. Hopefully, you can tell they are meant to resemble winter trees against a night sky!
One day, DH and I left our lives as we knew them and moved to a small town in Pennsylvania to open a pottery shop. The piggy bank below was a joint creation from that time. DH threw a vase shape (set pig on its bottom and remove all attachments and you will see the vase) and I added the piggy details and decoration. This one was called polka dot pig and I kept it for myself. We sold barnyard pig and blue sky pig.
Also, during this time, I tried my hand at sculpture again. This time I used a photo of a civil war re-enactor published in the paper to create this clay sculpture version. I called it "Rebel Yell" because that was the caption in the newspaper. I was secretly quite pleased with this sculpture. My father's comment, who is a Civil War buff, was that it didn't look like he was yelling. Oh well, at some point in your life you've got to give up trying to impress your father.

DH made the covered jar below in his past life (i.e. before we met) and it now sits in our dining room and contains his father's ashes.

Part of our pottery collection displayed in our house, consisting of both things we have made (mostly DH) and the work of others.

Interlude

2007-07-19T18:19:00.000-07:00

I'm up to Fact #6, "I love clay" and I think it deserves some thought so I won't be posting about that for a few days--or anything else, either. My parents and their 2 dogs are coming to spend Friday and Saturday nights with us and we're all going to participate in a family reunion over the next 2 days. I've got to get busy cleaning the house and finishing up a few things at work. I'll catch up with you soon!

The Return of Rocket! (plus Facts 4&5)

2007-07-18T16:15:00.001-07:00

Well, it's time for Fact #4 & 5 (I thought I would write about them together because they both seem to involve some kind of commitment phobia.), however, first, news about our wildlife! Rocket is back!! When DH got home tonight, he was refilling the bird feeders when he came across Rocket Girl near our crawl space door. Not wanting her to disappear before I got home, he put her in the pond:

When I got home, we took her out and placed her on the ground with some dried fruit (out of blueberries).
Here she eyes a dried cranberry:

And goes for it! (stepping on the white raisin in the process)

Rocket Girl update: DH says she is back in the pond of her own volition. We've got to put in a ramp!

Okay; just back from putting a piece of split firewood at one corner of the pond. I placed her on it--half in and half out. We'll check on her later.

On to changing jobs and changing homes. I feel like making this quick. Reasons I've changed jobs: to move up; to de-stress; to try being a full-time homemaker (if you know me, this is a laugh riot); to travel; to have more flexibility; to go to school. Thing that made this possible (beyond changing jobs to move up, which I mostly did before I got married): marrying a man who had the potential to make a good living and whose passion was to make me happy. Problem with this strategy--I'm never happy for long. Why he still loves me: I don't know!

Now, moving: my family did that a lot before my parents bought their first house when I was 12. They stayed put for a long time after that. When I met DH, I had just purchased a small town house in the suburbs and he was renting a town house closer in, which meant my mortgage payments were a lot less than his rent payments. Therefore, first move was from his place to mine. Next move to get a bigger townhouse. Next purchase to move closer to town; next purchase to move to a bigger house, then back to a smaller house to save money; then to a house in a small town to set up shop as potters (more on that under "I love clay"); next move to another big city for DH's job; next move to a small city for DH's job (because he hated the previous job). Final two moves: one to be closer to school during my graduate work (neither one of us can stand long commutes); one to the current house, close to both of our jobs and a house that we love.

Whew; that's it for tonight. Hope all are well.

Random Fact #3

2007-07-16T10:50:00.000-07:00

Fact: I have 2 degrees in early childhood education, but never taught or worked directly with children.

So, when last you visited, I had received a bachelor's degree in early childhood education. On to a career in teaching, right? Wrong. . .After student teaching for the last semester of my senior year, I ended up hating teaching!! Now, I didn't go into this just willy nilly. When, during my sophomore year, I thought I might want to teach young children (1st grade was my inclination), I spent a week with my uncle who was an elementary school principal and assisted in one of the first grade classrooms. I loved it. So, what went wrong? I don't know. Student teaching was like one continuous test. Every day your work was being observed by the classroom teacher you were working with or your college professor or both. It was draining and nerve wracking. Keeping the kids focused was a challenge. I could feel my patience wear thin with two or three boys with problems (these were 7 year olds!). If I was losing my patience as a student teacher, how was I going to be a good "real" teacher? Also, after all the schooling, it was amazing how unprepared I felt to actually start a classroom. Here's your room; now what? Anyway, much of this can be chalked up to immaturity and the rest to the fact that I just did not have the personality characteristics to work with large groups of children all day long. I should have investigated becoming a reading teacher or something where I could work with students one-on-one or in small groups, but I was not smart enough to think of that then and just wanted to get out! So, I graduated and then went floundering around in the job market for years, mostly using the clerical skills I had learned in high school. I may try to remember all of the places I have worked and list those tomorrow, but for now, let's move along to the second degree.

I maintained my interest in child development and educational policy (and, along the way, child care policy) and one day, about 6 years ago, took a job with a small non-profit early childhood education-focused association. The job turned into conference planning as one of the main programs of this association was to hold a statewide education conference. If you've caught on to the theme of my life at this point, it will come as no surprise to find that I hate conference planning!! (Of course, I didn't know that at the time and didn't know the job would have such a narrow focus.) This is when I had a revelation. If I wanted to be involved in the early childhood education field in a more substantive way, I was going to have to get more education. So, off to graduate school I went with the goal of earning at least a master's degree. I found a nearby program that offered a Master of Arts in early childhood education. It was for people who were interested in policy and research and did not require participants to have had a teaching background. It was, in fact, geared toward people who wanted to get a doctorate in education, but who did not yet have a master's degree. I had decided that I wanted a job analyzing research and making recommendations for early care and education policy in the U.S. or evaluating education and care programs and policy. What I didn't know was whether or not I needed a Ph.D. to do that. Being the reluctant student that I am, I was always questioning whether or not I should go into the Ph.D. program.

To wrap this up, I received my M.A. in 2004 and continued with the Ph.D. program, always with a finger to the wind hoping that the right job would fall into my lap sooner rather than later. That happened in 2006 when the non-profit where I had worked 6 years earlier, and was then serving on the Board of, decided to hire a new Executive Director. Ta da! I have just finished one year as the Executive Director. I wonder how long this will last?

Random Fact #2

2007-07-15T15:03:00.000-07:00

Fact: I graduated from high school a year early and entered college a year late.

The year was 1976. A friend of mine noted that one could get all of the high school credits then required for graduation by the end of the 11th grade. All you needed was permission from your parents. We were in the 11th grade and both hated school, so we decided to go this route. (A couple of years later, they raised the number of credit hours needed so this was no longer possible.) So, there I was, a high school graduate 2 weeks before my 17th birthday with absolutely no job experience and no idea what I was going to do. My father says that I had promised him that I would go to college if he permitted the early graduation. This may be true because I probably would have promised almost anything to get out of high school, but, in truth, the idea of college scared me to death and I had no intention of going. (Not to mention that my parents had not done one thing to prepare me for the possibility of going to college--did not insist that I take college prep courses in high school, did not suggest that we go visit colleges, did not insist that I take the SATs.)

So, after a summer of doing nothing, my mom helped me get a job doing odds and ends in a small office through a friend of hers at church. Eventually, I took the civil servant's exam in preparation for applying for a federal government job (we lived in Maryland and both of my parents worked for the government in D.C.). I had taken typing in high school, but was never very good at it, but my skills were enough to make me eligible for clerical jobs. I got one at the National Endowment for the Arts. I worked there for a year with the growing realization that I was probably going to have to screw up my courage and go to college because my brain was turning to mush. During this time I was seeing a psychiatrist (something I've done more often than not during my adult life). I remember going to an appointment and crying (sobbing) because I thought I would have to figure out how to make myself go. To get to the point, I ended up at a small liberal arts school that was part of the state higher education system. They took me without the SATs because I had a good grade point average from high school (never mind that the courses were things like typing, business math, and individualized reading) and I had taken the ACTs and scored well. They also welcomed me because at the ripe old age of 19, I was considered an "older returning student." Yes; I had so much life experience! I was shaking so badly when I went to check in the first day that I could barely sign my name for the key to my room. Well, I made it through and graduated after 4.5 years with a degree in early childhood education. More on that tomorrow!

8 Random Facts

2007-07-14T12:46:00.002-07:00

Here are the rules for Eight Random Facts:
Players start with eight random facts/habits about themselves.People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

Thanks to Possumlady for tagging me for 8 random facts (BTW, what's a "meme"?) I definitely do not know 8 other bloggers to tag; maybe not even one! (Anvilcloud, have you done this yet?) I invite anyone who reads my blog and has not done this yet to participate.

Here are my eight, but I think I will drag this out over the next 7 days and only post details about each fact on a different day. This will give me something to write about for a whole week!

1.) I was living in Cuba when President Kennedy was assassinated.

2.) I graduated a year early from high school and went to collage a year late.

3.) I have 2 degrees in early childhood education, but never taught or worked directly with children.

4.) I’ve never had the same job for more than 3 years.

5.) As an adult, I have never lived in the same house for more than 4 years.

6.) I love clay.

7.) I am an atheist.

8.) I’ve taken a boat ride on the Seine and seen the Eiffel Tower under a full moon.

Okay, so here's the scoop for #1: Having been born in 1959, I was 4 years old when President Kennedy was shot. My father was a teacher at the time and had volunteered (or signed up) to teach for 9 months on Guantanamo Base (I think it was at a school for the soldiers' children. As far as I know, he taught junior high English and geography. Maybe it was for the soldiers themselves; I'll have to ask him.) I don't remember learning that the President had been shot. (I wonder if I have any actual memories from that time or just memories of stories told to me.) My mother says my Dad came home from school to tell her. That's it. I just always thought it was an odd bit of trivia that we were living in Cuba at the time.

Other thoughts about that time: We had a huge old tree in the yard with a tire swing and iguanas that would run up the trunk. My mom shopped at a grocery store (on base?) where there was a big "pen" outside where you were supposed to leave your children while you were shopping. I hated that and would beg to go inside and be really quiet so no one would notice I was there. I went to nursery school in Cuba. My 2-year old brother and I found a coconut once. While my father tried to open it for us (not an easy thing to do and my father gets easily frustrated--a trait I have inherited) we jumped up and down wanting to taste it. When he finally got it open, he was so frustrated that he dumped the coconut juice on my head. He felt terribly guilty about it for years and I was frequently prompted by my mother to tell him that this incident had not ruined my life, which I dutifully did. However, I do think it left a little psychic scar! Also, there was a hurricane when we lived there. For the duration, we had to go stay with a neighbor that had a brick house (we lived in a wooden house--sounds like the 3 Little Pigs). While we were there she made what we came to call "Cuban Candy," which consists of evaporated milk and sugar cooked to a "soft ball" stage, then slightly cooled and rolled into little balls with butter and cinnamon on them. As Americans, always looking for a short cut, we have since always made this by pouring the boiling mixture onto a buttered plate and dousing with cinnamon. Then, cutting into squares and eating it after it cooled. Kind of like vanilla fudge. That's it for my recollections from Cuba. Tomorrow stories of high school and college.

I've Been Tagged!

2007-07-12T19:29:00.000-07:00

So, Possumlady has "tagged" me to tell 8 facts (things?) about myself. This will require some thought, so that is not what I'll write about tonight.

Rocket (the box turtle) has not been seen for 36 hours. I knew that this would happen. Just when we named her and I started to feel invested in her welfare, she disappears! It happened once before and she appeared again, but I think she may have escaped the confines of our backyard and gone on to someone else's. However, I wonder if anyone else will feed her blueberries?

On to a totally different subject: Why do I like tv shows about horrible, despicable things? This particularly hit home last night after I watched "Criminal Intent" about a pedophile and realized that the episode of "The Closer" on Monday night was also about a pedophile. I'm addicted to Law and Order, both the original and SVU, which always has horrific crimes. Often, I have to look away when they show close-ups of gross stuff and yet I keep coming back. What is this phenomenon? Any ideas?

To end on a brighter note, here are some photos of our sunflowers and our tomatoes. We finally have gotten some much needed rain the last two evenings.

I didn't do this intentionally, but I thought this was an interesting silhouetting effect. (That's our neighbor's house in the background. Our neighbors who, after almost a year, we still do not know the names of. Sad commentary.)

You can see my relatively new Subaru Tribeca in the driveway.

Some ripe cherry tomatoes with some "regular" tomatoes that look promising.

NYT Article

2007-07-10T18:32:00.000-07:00

I have about 4 things on my mind that I could blog about today. (I will probably forget what they are by tomorrow.) But, today, I want to post an article that was published in the New York Times in January. It just came across my desk today. Perhaps you read it when it was originally published or have seen articles like it. However, I thought it was a telling commentary about the Iraq war and the U.S. commitment to other priorities, so I will post it here today.

The New York Times, Business Section

Economix

What $1.2 Trillion Can Buy

By DAVID LEONHARDT

Published: January 17, 2007

The human mind isn’t very well equipped to make sense of a figure like $1.2 trillion. We don’t deal with a trillion of anything in our daily lives, and so when we come across such a big number, it is hard to distinguish it from any other big number. Millions, billions, a trillion — they all start to sound the same.

Skip to next paragraph

Multimedia

Graphic

Putting the Annual Cost of War in Perspective

The way to come to grips with $1.2 trillion is to forget about the number itself and think instead about what you could buy with the money. When you do that, a trillion stops sounding anything like millions or billions.

For starters, $1.2 trillion would pay for an unprecedented public health campaign — a doubling of cancer research funding, treatment for every American whose diabetes or heart disease is now going unmanaged and a global immunization campaign to save millions of children’s lives.

Combined, the cost of running those programs for a decade wouldn’t use up even half our money pot. So we could then turn to poverty and education, starting with universal preschool for every 3- and 4-year-old child across the country. The city of New Orleans could also receive a huge increase in reconstruction funds.

The final big chunk of the money could go to national security. The recommendations of the 9/11 Commission that have not been put in place — better baggage and cargo screening, stronger measures against nuclear proliferation — could be enacted. Financing for the war in Afghanistan could be increased to beat back the Taliban’s recent gains, and a peacekeeping force could put a stop to the genocide in Darfur.

All that would be one way to spend $1.2 trillion. Here would be another:

The war in Iraq.

In the days before the war almost five years ago, the Pentagon estimated that it would cost about $50 billion. Democratic staff members in Congress largely agreed. Lawrence Lindsey, a White House economic adviser, was a bit more realistic, predicting that the cost could go as high as $200 billion, but President Bush fired him in part for saying so.

These estimates probably would have turned out to be too optimistic even if the war had gone well. Throughout history, people have typically underestimated the cost of war, as William Nordhaus, a Yale economist, has pointed out.

But the deteriorating situation in Iraq has caused the initial predictions to be off the mark by a scale that is difficult to fathom. The operation itself — the helicopters, the tanks, the fuel needed to run them, the combat pay for enlisted troops, the salaries of reservists and contractors, the rebuilding of Iraq — is costing more than $300 million a day, estimates Scott Wallsten, an economist in Washington.

That translates into a couple of billion dollars a week and, over the full course of the war, an eventual total of $700 billion in direct spending.

The two best-known analyses of the war’s costs agree on this figure, but they diverge from there. Linda Bilmes, at the Kennedy School of Government at Harvard, and Joseph Stiglitz, a Nobel laureate and former Clinton administration adviser, put a total price tag of more than $2 trillion on the war. They include a number of indirect costs, like the economic stimulus that the war funds would have provided if they had been spent in this country.

Mr. Wallsten, who worked with Katrina Kosec, another economist, argues for a figure closer to $1 trillion in today’s dollars. My own estimate falls on the conservative side, largely because it focuses on the actual money that Americans would have been able to spend in the absence of a war. I didn’t even attempt to put a monetary value on the more than 3,000 American deaths in the war.

Besides the direct military spending, I’m including the gas tax that the war has effectively imposed on American families (to the benefit of oil-producing countries like Iran, Russia and Saudi Arabia). At the start of 2003, a barrel of oil was selling for $30. Since then, the average price has been about $50. Attributing even $5 of this difference to the conflict adds another $150 billion to the war’s price tag, Ms. Bilmes and Mr. Stiglitz say.

The war has also guaranteed some big future expenses. Replacing the hardware used in Iraq and otherwise getting the United States military back into its prewar fighting shape could cost $100 billion. And if this war’s veterans receive disability payments and medical care at the same rate as veterans of the first gulf war, their health costs will add up to $250 billion. If the disability rate matches Vietnam’s, the number climbs higher. Either way, Ms. Bilmes says, “It’s like a miniature Medicare.”

In economic terms, you can think of these medical costs as the difference between how productive the soldiers would have been as, say, computer programmers or firefighters and how productive they will be as wounded veterans. In human terms, you can think of soldiers like Jason Poole, a young corporal profiled in The New York Times last year. Before the war, he had planned to be a teacher. After being hit by a roadside bomb in 2004, he spent hundreds of hours learning to walk and talk again, and he now splits his time between a community college and a hospital in Northern California.

Whatever number you use for the war’s total cost, it will tower over costs that normally seem prohibitive. Right now, including everything, the war is costing about $200 billion a year.

Treating heart disease and diabetes, by contrast, would probably cost about $50 billion a year. The remaining 9/11 Commission recommendations — held up in Congress partly because of their cost — might cost somewhat less. Universal preschool would be $35 billion. In Afghanistan, $10 billion could make a real difference. At the National Cancer Institute, annual budget is about $6 billion.

“This war has skewed our thinking about resources,” said Mr. Wallsten, a senior fellow at the Progress and Freedom Foundation, a conservative-leaning research group. “In the context of the war, $20 billion is nothing.”

As it happens, $20 billion is not a bad ballpark estimate for the added cost of Mr. Bush’s planned surge in troops. By itself, of course, that price tag doesn’t mean the surge is a bad idea. If it offers the best chance to stabilize Iraq, then it may well be the right option.

But the standard shouldn’t simply be whether a surge is better than the most popular alternative — a far-less-expensive political strategy that includes getting tough with the Iraqi government. The standard should be whether the surge would be better than the political strategy plus whatever else might be accomplished with the $20 billion.

This time, it would be nice to have that discussion before the troops reach Iraq.

leonhardt@nytimes.com

The Next Phase

2007-07-08T18:55:00.000-07:00

It seems that DH and I are about to enter the next phase of our lives. He is ready to retire and I just started a new job a year ago. Actually, that was the plan. I was in school for 4 years prior to taking this job. I got my master's degree and was working on a doctorate when this job opportunity came along that was more attractive to me than 2 more years of school. So, the plan was, when I finished school and got a job, he could retire. Thankfully, for our finances, he does not really want to retire, just step down from his current stressful position, which he finds increasingly distasteful, and get something less demanding (which usually means something less lucrative, as well). So, we spent most of today looking at our finances, figuring our retirement income and talking about various job possibilities for him. It is scary to know how much, and how soon, he would like to leave his current position without knowing what he might do instead. However, he will turn 63 next month and he has been the major contributor to our finances during our marriage, so I whole heartedly support his decision to "downshift." For my part, I better go into work tomorrow with renewed vigor and commitment because it's my turn now to be the major breadwinner (although, if he finds another suitable position, we might not need to touch our retirement savings for another 3 years or so). Well, that's all that's fit to print for today!

Hodge Podge

2007-07-07T17:56:00.000-07:00

I have been sinking into a funk since yesterday. Is it a coincidence that this coincides with my attempt to restart my "program?" I don't think so, because the day before I went back on my program, I was already feeling a little blah and edgy (for me, it is possible to feel blah and edgy at the same time). That day, I was eating whatever I wanted and that included a bit of wine and quite a few chocolate cupcakes. However, it was in the mindset of "going on a program tomorrow; better try to satisfy all my cravings now." So, perhaps I am a bit down because I really don't feel like thinking about what I'm going to eat and that I'm getting flabby and should be exercising.

DH and I took some days off of work and every day (which coincides with my program) he has wanted to go out to eat for lunch or breakfast or brunch. This is not like him. I have managed to be moderate in what I am eating despite this. Today after brunch, we went to Trader Joe's and I stocked up on my favorite gazpacho and some frozen cooked shrimp. Thaw out a few of those and toss them in the soup and you have a light, refreshing, and healthy meal (if you can call that a meal and not just an appetizer!). Anyway, enough of that. Certainly I must have something else to talk about.

I also may be a little down because I thought I might take advantage of this time to read a short book about the status of the profession that I am a member of (if it is a profession; there is a bit of controversy about that) and do some thinking and writing about that, but I just haven't felt like it and now tomorrow is Sunday, then Monday and I will be back to the daily grind, not having accomplished anything over the past 5 days. The thing is, doing nothing is really what I feel like doing! Thanks to DH's participation, I have managed to do 20 minutes of exercise for 3 days in a row. That's something!

After thinking he (she?) had left us, we continue to see the turtle around (I guess technically it is a tortoise because it does not have webbed feet and spends most of it's time on land.). DH has decided to name it "Rocket," because he does seem to get around. One minute he's there; the next minute he's not. (Unless he's in the pond from which he must be removed on occasion.) Our poor dogs--Harry and Nutmeg have been very reluctant to go out in the yard for their final pee pees in the evening due to being traumatized by the fireworks on the 4th. To reinforce their fear, there was another fireworks display somewhere nearby tonight for some reason!

What else? Nothing really. So, to make up for a boring, negative post, here are some photos of flowers in our yard this spring, before I was blogging and before this interminable heat and drought set in.

P.S., Poundage today 197.8

What Season Is It?

2007-07-06T19:30:00.000-07:00

These are photos of our yard taken today, not last October! I'm very thankful that I do not live in Texas where they are having terrible floods, or in Boise, Idaho where it was supposed to be about 105 today, but it's plenty hot and dry here. These leaves seem to be from one tree--a tulip poplar on which about half of the leaves have turned yellow. We don't know if it is stressed by the lack of rain or if something else is wrong with it. It's a very large tree, which we would hate to lose because it helps sheild us from the neighbor's backyard. We live in a subdivision with houses all around, but because we have some tall, mature trees, we have a nice feeling of privacy from late spring to the middle of fall. DH called a tree service today to see if they had an arborist who could come out and take a look at it. We are still waiting for a return call.

Meanwhile, here is a photo of Harry enjoying the very brief snow we had this past winter. He looks pathetic, but we really didn't make him stay out there! With his hair, he enjoys cold weather. Poor guy; today we took him and Meg to the vet and the car was so hot; I felt so sorry for him. The vet is close so the car was just starting to cool down when we got there. We found out that Meg had gained 10 lbs. since January! She's not fat, but she's not as active as she used to be and she is looking a little thicker through the waist (it happens to all of us!).

"Mom, can I have a fish for dinner? They're supposed to be good for you!"

2007-07-05T14:04:00.000-07:00

What to talk about today? First crop of cherry tomatos from the garden yesterday. Harry and Nutmeg go to the vet tomorrow for check-ups and Meg has gotten a bald spot on her leg that needs to be looked at. They were a little uncomfortable with the sounds of fireworks last night. Harry, who's got hip dysplasia and doesn't usually do this kind of thing, got up on the sofa with me and then later on the bed with DH. The turtle is still around. He's been roaming around the yard and taking the occasional dip in the pond. But, what really is on my mind today is weight, mine specifically. It's been going up and up and up since I was about 29, with 2 major weight loss successes mixed in there. I don't want to be as thin as I was in my 20s, but I would like to stabilize at a comfortable and healthy weight. I have never been able to maintain my weight--it's either going up or down, and mostly it's going up. In the spirit of true confessions behind the annonymity of my blog, I am about 5 foot 7 inches and current 199.6 lbs. Which is good, considering I had gotten up to over 200 and that's when I really get uncomfortable. I've decided today is the day I am going back on a "program."

About 7 weeks ago, I got a Jack Lalane juicer. This was inspired by reading about "cleansing juice fasts." I was obviously in some kind of mood the day I ordered it. Anyway, I decided I would try a 3-day juice fast. Well, I quickly found out that just juice had an ill effect on my blood sugar (this is based on how I felt, not any knowlege of a medical problem) and I started thinking, "Hey, isn't fiber supposed to be good for you? Why am I taking the fiber out of my fruits and vegetables?" So, this morphed into an effort to make healthier food choices and generally eat less. This translates into not continuing to eat when I am full, no wine, and no artificial sweets (love sweets; those are my downfall). At that time, I decided not to eat red meat or pork either. Just concentrate on fish and chicken. Well, I was doing pretty well and that is when I dipped down below 200 lbs for the first time in over a year. Then, PMDD hit!! Suddenly, I was out of control, eating a whole large chocolate bar with a bottle of red wine. Polishing off a chocolate cake at work (a half of a cake!), having wine when I got home from work, etc. I had just gotten excited because my clothes were fitting better and I could feel them getting tight again.

Well, the PMDD is over (for a couple of weeks) and I got up the nerve to weigh myself this morning as a precurser to getting on the program again. (A lot of people say forget the scale; what is important is how you feel and how your clothes fit. I've always found that there's a direct correlation between my weight and those things.) Anyway, I was relieved to find that I had not undone all of my previous efforts, having not gone beyond 200 lbs. yet, as stated earlier. So, I am going to renew my efforts and hope to even add a little exercise this time (ugh!). I will not make every post about my weight or "the program," but may put some stats at the end of each post to keep track of my progress and what I ate that day--if I feel like it. So, today I offer you (and me) some photos of my current shape in a dress that I had to buy recently to go to a dressy work affair. I actually wore stockings and high heels! Felt like a stuffed sausage (is there any other kind?). After trying on almost every party dress in the women's department at the store, I opted for this straight dress rather than the others, in which I looked like a linebacker in a tutu. Anyway, it is my hope that the next time I wear a dress, I will not look like a flower covered refrigerator or a line backer in a tutu. I'd like to stop being shocked when I see myself in photos!
Poundage: 199.6

From a Distance

2007-07-04T16:14:00.000-07:00

Happy Independence Day. This photo was taken when I was on a trip to D.C. this past March. I am in a somber mood this July 4th. I am feeling the weight of the arrogance of the United States. Before I say anything else, I'm glad I was born in the U.S. and I wouldn't want to live anywhere else (maybe Canada, but I don't really know that much about Canada). I consider myself very fortunate. I grew up in the D.C. area and there is no more moving place to watch fireworks on the 4th of July than standing on the Washington Mall with the Capitol behind you and the Washington Monument in front as the backdrop for the fireworks.

However, when celebrating the "home of the free and the brave" my patriotism is sometimes tempered by thoughts of what we took away from the Native Americans to make this the U.S. and what we try to impose on others. We are really a bullying lot. We take what we want and find a way to justify it later.

Yesterday, I was listening to a Nanci Griffith CD on the way home and she sings a version of "From a Distance." As I sang along, I found myself getting choked up. "From a distance you look like my friend even though we are at war." I have been against invading Iraq since the beginning. I do not believe in forcing our beliefs on other peoples. We are (mostly) happy with our democracy and therefore, we assume others must want it, too. (I know there are a lot of other complex reasons for the war), but the reason we have Independence Day is because a majority of people who settled in the US. wanted independence, wanted a different form of government. That cannot be forced on people and succeed. It has to come from within. People must rise up and demand it. Seems to me in Iraq we went there and said you have a bad leader, we're sure you would want to do things our way. We'll get rid of your leader and then you'll be free to "have it our way." Any surprise it is not working? This is the kind of imposed government that our ancestors fought against. We want the freedom to create the kind of government we want and we're willing to fight and die for it. It just doesn't work if you impose it from the outside. So, I am sad. I believe we have made life worse for millions of Iraqi citizens and there is no chance we can repair the damage we've done. I respect our troops and cherish their belief in doing what their country needs of them, but I hate to see one more person die for a situation that I do not see improving whether we leave tomorrow or 10 years from now. So, Happy 4th of July. Yes; I'm glad to be an American, but look forward to a time when we have wiser leadership and that will only happen when we become wiser ourselves.

Dogs; you've gotta love 'em

2007-07-02T19:29:00.001-07:00

I wanted to post a photo of Sandy, a dog in NC that stayed by a missing toddler all night and alerted searchers with a bark. They found the toddler sitting on a tree stump with his faithful companion by his side. However, I couldn't figure out how to post the photo from the newspaper. So, I've decided to use this opportunity to introduce you to our dogs, Nutmeg (Meg) and Harry. Guess which one is Harry and which is Nutmeg! They are both shelter dogs. Harry came to us after the shelter could no longer care for him. That was about 2 years ago. The vet said at the time that he could be anywhere between 4 and 7 years of age. He is clearly part Chow because his tongue is totally black. We went to the shelter and chose Meg about a year later. She was about 6 months at the time. I could tell lots of stories about them, but I need to go to bed now, so more later.

Backyard Birds

2007-06-30T21:00:00.001-07:00

We have three bird feeders set up in our yard--the window feeder in the previous post with the bluebird, this box feeder, and a "Yankee Twirler" (metal bar the encircles the base of the feeder and spins when the weight of a squirrel lands on it). We get a lot of cardinals. We also have at least one pair of red-bellied woodpeckers that have produced the baby pictured here. We had been watching the mother (could it have been the father?) coming to our box feeder and carrying seeds back to the baby perched on the side of a tree. After many days of this, the baby finally ventured down to the feeder. No red spot on his head yet. Once the red feathers appear on the head, they quickly get hard to distinguish from the adult birds. Today I saw a baby downy woodpecker at our window feeder. The window feeder was filled with unshelled sunflower seeds and the downy woodpecker perched on the side of the feeder and commenced tossing out the seeds. Finally, I shooed (how do you spell "shoed"?) him away because he wasn't eating any of them. We also occasionally see a red headed woodpecker.

Turtle Pics

2007-06-29T15:08:00.000-07:00

Here are a couple of pics of our visiting box turtle.

Images of Puerto Rico

2007-06-29T11:07:00.000-07:00

I was inspired to post these photos because my friend possumlady is about to go to Puerto Rico. My husband and I and some friends were there for one day in January because it was a stop on our cruise. Would be nice to go back and stay longer--but in January, not July!!

Kermit

2007-06-29T10:57:00.001-07:00

This guy is Kermit. He came with the pond, which came with the house when we bought it last year. He survived the winter, I assume hibernating in the mud at the bottom of the pond. When it started to get warm this spring, we saw him hanging out again in and by the pond. Then one day he was gone. It's been at least 6 weeks, maybe more, since we last saw him, so we assume he moved on, probably looking for a mate. So, we miss Kermit, but now we have the turtle. I found him in the pond again when I came home for work. It is incredibly hot outside and I know he needs hydration, but my fear continues to be that he can get in, but that he cannot get back out. So, I'm happy to have him take dips in the pond, but feel I must monitor him to make sure he doesn't drown or get waterlogged in there. We haven't named the turtle. Frankly, I'm hoping he moves on so that I don't have to feel responsible for his welfare.

More on Box Turtle

2007-06-27T18:43:00.000-07:00

Oops. . .almost forgot. We saw the box turtle again tonight. This time he was in our pond, which I don't think is a good thing because our pond is above ground on one side with slate overhangs and he/she could have fallen in, but have no way to get out. Also, do they eat goldfish? Anyway, we took him out and put him on dry land again. Here's a photo of our pond. I took a photo of the turtle in the pond, but that one's still in the camera. Maybe tomorrow.

First Photo!

2007-06-27T18:20:00.000-07:00

Okay; well here it is. . .my first photo on my blog! This is my pathetic attempt to take a photo of a bird (it's a bluebird in case you can't tell) at our window feeder. Mary, now you can see why I'm so in awe of your photos!

I've been in a whining, complaining mood all day and had plenty of things to say earlier, but now I'm just tired. Probably just as well that I didn't bore you with my trivial whining!

Sore Boobs!

2007-06-26T14:24:00.001-07:00

Arggg. . .it's that time of month again. I can already feel my breasts getting sore and I have at least 8-10 more days to go before my period! I have PMDD--never heard of it; think PMS on steroids. I even take medication to mitigate the symptoms, but there are still 2 weeks out of every month when my whole being is compromised. As I said, Arggggg!!

Box Turtles

2007-06-25T17:55:00.001-07:00

This evening, we discovered a box turtle on our patio. We used to have a bullfrog that lived in our pond, but then one day this spring, he hopped away looking for a mate, died at the bottom of the pond and never floated up, or got eaten by some type of large bird (he was a pretty big bullfrog!). Tonight this box turtle wandered up. We live in a suburban neighborhood on about 1/3 acre with shallow woods at the edge of our backyard and more yards on every side of us. Where did this turtle come from and why did he/she wander over here? I put a few blueberries down in front of it and he snatched them up. The dogs don't see to bother with reptiles and amphibians. If they are moving, they are interested, but if they are still, they treat them like they would a rock. Too bad I don't know how to post photos yet. Soon. . .Got to go--The Closer is starting and it's a new episode!

Act II

2007-06-24T22:30:00.000-07:00

As the curtain rises, we find our heroine seated at the head of a Board table listening to the rising cacophony of agitated female voices. The room is getting hot and the afternoon is growning long. Those not engaged in talking are showing the wilting weariness of realization that yet another issue will go unresolved. What have we accomplished; why are we here? During Act II, one must put aside such self-indulgent questions and reconcile oneself to the work and satisfactions to be had in the time remaining. On to the task at hand. . .what will I wear to work tomorrow?!